Monday, June 8, 2009

Fast Start to the Work Week



Today, North Korea sentenced two American journalists to twelve years in prison for what amounts to trespassing. Aye caramba! Well, at least L’il Kim and the NoKo’s put their bad guys on trial. Americans, we just slap ‘em in Gitmo and let ‘em rot. Sad day when North Korea can claim the moral high ground on the U.S.




Today the Supreme Court ruled that “Don’t ask, don’t tell” could stay in place. Check it: You’re in a foxhole with your buddies. Y’all are taking fire from every direction. BOOM! BAM! BOOM! You’re in a fight for your life. Now, I ask you…do you really give a flyin’ rat’s ass if the other motherhubbards in the hole with you are gay or straight?




Judge Sotomayor busted her ankle on the way to D.C. today. Yo SoSo…can I sign your cast? Question: You think Newt, the Boner or Fat Boy have a well-hexed voodoo doll somewhere in their possession?




And finally today…Mondays are the most popular day to start a diet. No problem with that. If you’re one of the millions tryin’ to suppress your appetites today, we’ve got four words that’ll help. Ready? Here goes…




Susan. Boyle. Sex. Tape. YIKES!!! If that doesn’t make you lose your appetite, or, at least, make you blow chunks…you have what they call a “cast-iron stomach.”





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