The Cup Runneth Over

For a football lover like me, there is nothing better than the World Cup. This football doesn’t pit Los Angeles against New York or Miami against Denver like American football does. No, this football pits the likes of Germany against Serbia (just like WWII) and the United States against England (just like 1776!). The international flavor of World Cup football is one of its biggest draws. Which brings me to North Korea.

A couple of days ago Yahoo Sports did a profile on the North Korean football team. The comment section quickly filled up with vitriolic statements like, “If you don’t win, they’ll execute you” and “Your country sucks” and “I hope you all die.” Aye caramba!

Now, I know there are a lot of haters out there. Heck-fire…I’m one of ‘em but this is the World Cup...THE WORLD FRIGGIN' CUP...you could, at least, admit that North Korea is a football team that has earned a place in the tournament and should be treated with the same respect as every other team in the tournament. Don't hate their politics, love their football. I’m no fan of Angela Merkel but I don’t go ‘round calling the German team Nazis. And I’m no fan of l’il Kim either but these players have earned the right to play on the world’s most prestigious stage…even if they are the biggest long shots in the tournament.

Remember...sports fans LOVE an underdog and no team is more underdogged than North Korea. I , for one, hope North Korea plays their collective arses off and give Joga Bonito, and the rest of us, a game...no, a World Cup for the ages. Oh yeah, and one other thing…

QUEEN ELIZABETH IS BUTT UGLY…PRINCE CHARLES HAS A SMALL PENIS AND FISH AND CHIPS TASTE LIKE ASS!!!

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Why Arizona Should Secede

Papers or Plastic

So I’m sittin’ in front of the tube last night, tryin’ to get my pea brain around this new Arizona immigration law, when the Military Channel pops on an episode of The World at War. It’s a twenty-something part documentary on WWII. This particular episode covered the rise of the Nazi Party in the mid-30’s. And then, it hit me…

The WAW narrator started talkin’ about what the Nazis did when they took over. The first thing they did was vilify the press calling it “liberal” and “anti-German.” Sound familiar? Then the Nazis outlawed all unions. Ya see where I’m goin’ with this?

Next, Hitler’s goons started rounding up intellectuals (elitists) and immigrants (dark-skinded brothers and sisters) and sendin’ ‘em off to the gulags. The Nazi regime explained that Germany was an infallible country, ordained by God to rule the world.

Now I’m not the sharpest tool in the shed, but it seems that the right-wing nut cases here in the USo’A, Inc., surely look and sound and act a lot like the Nazis of WWII. Don’t believe me? Tighty-righties routinely rag on the “liberal media.” The only people they trust on the tube are Faux News and Hee Haw. They’re anti-union, they pooh-pooh intellectuals and blame every problem in their lives on illegal immigration. I’m tellin’ y’all…this is gonna get interesting…but not in a good way. Mark my words.

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Nothing to Sneeze At

Earlier this month I posted about Nazi Germany’s bad-assed Stealth bomber. That puppy is one beautiful machine! ANYWAY…on that post I blathered on about how the Nazis woulda won WWII if the BSC little Austrian wasn’t in charge. The world certainly woulda been a different place. How different? Well, for starters, the USoA would have Universal Healthcare. Free medical for life in exchange for douchebag Nazis in charge? Well…they couldn’t have been any worse than the Bush-Wipes.



Speaking of the Bush-Wipes and Universal Healthcare…an open question to Governor Mark “of the Beast” Sanford, Senator John “Able Semen” Ensign and Senator David “Twitter” Vitter:
You chucklenuts all believe that JZeus’ Dad handpicked your sorry asses to help govern this great nation of ours. All y’all are members of the “C-Street” gang and believe in spreading the gospel on taxpayer time and money. That aside…Do you think JZeus would vote for or against Universal Healthcare? Gotcha! You see, no matter how many times you say you’re a Christian, your actions prove that all of you are nothing more than political opportunists, Republican party hacks and soulless, cold-hearted rat-bastard, hypocrites.



One quick story from the 775. The University of Nevada football team has been picked in a couple of polls to finish second to Boise State in the WAC Conference this year. Great. Getting picked to finish second in the WAC is kinda like bein’ the second prettiest “girl” on the all-male cellblock. Aye caramba!


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Stack 'Em All...Let God Sort 'Em Out

Anyone remember Lynndie England? Anyone? Bueller? Well, here at PTB our memories are longer than John Holmes’ woody…we remember.



Pfc. England is the moon-faced cherub who gets off stackin’ men “Giza” style. Yeah, she likes her some nude Twister -- tokin’ on a ciggy, pointin’ and smirkin that BSC little smirk of hers. She’s the kind of pervert that tiddles her thingy at night while fantasizing about abusing “towelheads.”
Just when you thought Pfc.E’s fifteen minutes had come and gone she’s back. Earlier this week she was coppin’ a ‘tude when she told a German newspaper that, “…what we did happens in war. It just isn't documented,".”



She’s got a point there but that kind of stuff should never happen at the hands of an American soldier. That might be how the Nazis rolled or how the commies rolled or how WWII Japan rolled but that’s not how we roll. That’s why you were a guest of the government at the Gray Bar Motel.



She went on to blame the media for the shit-storm, “…I felt pissed off,” she said. “If the media hadn't exposed the pictures to that extent, then thousands of lives would have been saved. If it had been broken by the news without the pictures it wouldn't have been that big." Talk about killing the messenger.
So, in her twisted logic, if the network news wouldn’t have showed the towers coming down on 9/11, it wouldn’t have been as big a deal. Talk about a tree falling in the forest…SHEESH!



Listen up you bass-ackward, uneducated, redneck…what you did (and what we’re STILL doing) to those prisoners in Abu Ghraib is torture, it is un-American and it is wrong (Are you listening Bush-Wipes?). The media did what the media is supposed to do – report the story. None of this happened because of the media. It happened because you and your cronies are immature, skeevy, abusive, power-trippin’, sadists. That’s the kind of behavior that pisses off the bad guys!



Look, you can nude pyramid all you like in the privacy of your own whatever. But when you’re wearin’ the uniform of the United States Army, your reprehensible conduct should be dealt with harshly. Like strippin’ YOU nude and stackin’ y’all in a pile. We’d pay to see that.


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There's a Reason Its the FIRST Amendment

It seems like the land of the free and the home of the brave is neither nowadays. We’re talking about the recent resignations of Geraldine “Black isn't Beautiful” Ferraro and Samantha “Monster” Power.



See, back in the day, the Soviets and the Nazis used to throw people in the gulag for opening their pie holes. China…same thing. Afghanistan, a country we’re fighting to give democracy and our bestest friends in the M.E., the Kingdom of Saud…KILL people for things they say.



That’s why we love the USofA. Our free speech is a Constitutional right. You can say anything you want and not have to fear the Reaper. “Fire” in a crowded theatre? No Problem. “Theatre” in a crowded firehouse? Yummy! It’s called Freedom. Of. Speech. That is, until recently.



It seems we’ve become so P.C. that saying something deemed “offensive” gets people’s knickers in a twist. Is Hillary a monster? Probably not. Is BoB where he is today ‘cause he’s a brown-skinded brother? Nope. But should someone get perp-walked to the door for saying such things? No.



We don’t necessarily agree with what everyone says but we’ll defend to the DEATH their right to say it. They’re just words. Remember, “Sticks and stones...”

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Speak Up!

Here at PTB y’all know where we stand on the subject of freedom of speech. Absolute. C’mon, this is America…right? TJ and BFrank and all those other crazy sexy-dressin' old crackers put speech right up there at number one for a reason…they knew that sticks and stones were the preferred weapon of an enemy because words were not very hurtful.

But nowadays…there is no such thing as FOS in America -- it's all selective at best.

You can go on television and say that “the tornado was caused by the wrath of God” but you can’t go on television and drop an accidental “F” bomb (or booby).

You (allegedly) can’t yell fire in a crowded theater but you can yell theater in a crowded fire house.

You can’t even utter words like bomb, explosion, terrorist, hijacking, crash or F#@K George Bush in an airport unless you want the Feds perp walking you to Gitmo. Is that free speech? No.

Ever blogged about your boss looking at you like you were a sexual toy or how your company rapes the environment or how your biggest client uses undocumented child slave-labor? Nice post. But if you speeched it, you know you don’t have THAT job anymore. Free huh?

Here's the crux of our biscuit: We have no problem with the Westboro Baptist Church protesting at funerals. It is a free country…right? The problem we have, is that the same people condemning the WBC for their “hurtful, hateful banners” didn’t say one word about the counter-protesters. Check out FX’s pic on Tuesday’s 5E. CP dude is sporting a Waffen Schutzstaffel insignia on his hat. That’s right…BSC’s Nazi SS. And he's supposed to be the GOOD guy?

If you're allowed to sport Nazi bling at an event, then “God Hates Fags” should be protected too. Free speech isn’t free speech unless everybody has it.


Everywhere.


All the time.


Don't worry folks...it won't hurt.

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