Flagged

Some call it the “forgotten holiday” but here at PTB, we love us some Flag Day! Yesterday, while enjoying a celebratory case of beer in honor of F.D., we were perusing the RGJ and nearly skidmarked our Underoos when we saw the pic, on page 1D. What, you say, was so bad that would lead to such a knee-jerk response? Two words – Flag. Ties. Aye caramba!



Back in the ‘90’s, The Newtster and his posse rolled out the “Contract With America.” It was a misogynistic, homophobic, xenophobic manifesto that propelled the far right to the halls of power. We’re still trying to recover from that fiasco. But that’s the crux of another biscuit.



One of the highlights of the tome, was a proposed constitutional amendment that would ban flag burning. Yeah, right. Like Newt Gingrich and his ilk are smarter than Jefferson, Franklin, Madison and the rest of our old-skewl motherhubbards. Not. It seemed like the republicans were more interested in protecting the U.S. flag from desecration than they were in protecting the Constitution from ill-advised amendments from BSC politicians.



But the far-right has wrapped itself in the S&S and proclaimed that anyone with different flag-related ideas was a commie-pinko, a terrorist, or worse – a Frenchman! Remember how they vilified Barry-O for not wearing a flag pin? Well…we’ve got news for the tighty-righties out there…y’all are wrong.



Section 8d of the U.S. Flag Code reads: "The flag should never be used as wearing apparel.” Yes, peoples, we do own a copy of the U.S. Flag Code. That’s how civics geeks roll. That means no flag pins for politicians, no flag patches for the PoPo and no flag ties for the unwashed (and un-educated) masses. Isn’t it ironic that the same people who swear to uphold the constitution are the same ones wanting to amend it for political gain – all while wearing the flag like it was a red white and blue corsage? Douchebags.



So, from us here at PTB...Happy belated Flag Day everyone…not that y’all needed any remindin’.



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Freeballin' Friday

Since tomorrow is Flag Day, it got us to thinkin’…if you make flag burning illegal, how then are you gonna get rid of old flags?

Speakin’ of flags…according to this website, it is NOT illegal to fly the flag of another country instead of the American flag. So to the fascist redneck who cut down the brother’s Mexican flag last year…you’re not a patriot, you’re an ass so STFU!


John McCain was a Marine. The U.S. Marine Corps creed is that “No one gets left behind.” Funny…he kicked his first wife to the curb ‘cause she got majorly messed up…way to show your loyalty bub.


The SCOTUS ruled yesterday that prisoners in Gitmo have the same rights as American citizens. The tiughty-righties are blowing a gasket. We got one thing to say to all y’all right-wing nutjobs…ALL MEN ARE CREATED EQUAL. True dat.


Chimp-dick has taken the oath of office twice and been in this gig for more than seven years. You’d think he’d know what his job description is. Nope. Yesterday the pResident regurgitated the tired old line that his job is to “protect the American people”. Wrong Bush-wipe. We don’t need your sorry ass protecting us. No, your job is to uphold the Constitution. So far, you’ve done piss-poor work.


Ron Paul ended his run for the presidency yesterday. Too bad. He’s the only real “change” candidate in the field. The American political landscape is a little less bright without Dr. Paul.


When Barack and Michelle Obama fist-bumped a couple of days ago, we said to ourselves “That’s never been done in American presidential politics.” The tighty-righties are calling it the “terrorist fist jab”. We were wrong, it has happened before. But no one'll call that one a terrorist fist bump.

Back here in the 775…a county employee is accused of stealing 2.2 MILLION dollars from the water department. They say he has a gambling problem. That is a crappy excuse. Gambling didn’t make you a thief. Gambling didn’t turn you into a liar and a cheat. You did all that on your own.


One more note on the H2OMG…most people can’t get out of work with a pilfered pen. WTF was management doing that they didn’t see 2.2 MILLION dollars missing? It’s not like the dude could walk out with it in his pants.


And finally…the University of Nevada lost a stud yesterday when Matt LaGrone transferred to Oregon State to play football. LaGrone says he was promised that he could play both football and basketball for the Wolf Pack after his sophomore year. Guess not. Coach Fox and A.D. Groth said he couldn’t. We ask…Why not? C’mon…if the kid is good enough to play…let him. Oh well. Can anyone remember a span of time in Wolf Pack athletic history that had so many firings, transfers, suspensions and generally bad behavior? From what we’re told, the morale up on the hill is in the drink. So too, it seems, may be Nevada athletics. We shall soon see.

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Betsy Ross Was A MILF!!!

We always get excited on Flag Day here at PTB. After all, the flag is the symbol of everything America stands for. Lately though, the Stars and Bars have become a little less popular with our brown-skinned brothers and sisters. Let's just hope we can rekindle a little love for the red, white and blue. We certainly could use it.

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