A WTF Weekend, Neh?

Half-Guv Sarah Palin got her Alaska reality show. Hollywood-types are reporting that Discovery Channel will pay more than $1 million per episode for the gig. Aye caramba! Funny, the former almost-VPILF always rags on the “lame stream media” and bashes reporters and journalists (like she’d know what they do). Now, with her gig on Faux News and her reality show, she has become what she says she hates...”Hollywood media elitist.” Welcome to the family Sarah!

Speaking of Hollywood…tonight is the last episode of 24. FULL DISCLOSURE: Every time you watch an episode of 24, we here at PTB make ONE MILLION DOLLARS! Who knew back in 2001 that Jack Bauer and company would have such an impact on American political landscape? Well…it’s over now and the republican party is gonna have to find a new series to scare the bejeezus out of the unwashed masses. May I suggest American Idol? FULL DISCLOSURE: Every time you watch an episode of American Idol, we here at PTB make ONE MILLION DOLLARS! True story.

And finally…Can someone be a Christian if they’re in a militia? Several members of “Hutaree,” a Christian militia were arrested over the weekend for plotting to kill police officers. YOW! Hey douchebags…WTF about the sixth commandment don’t you understand? Ever heard of turning the other cheek or loving thy neighbor? He isn’t called the Prince of Peace for nothing, ya know. Yer all a bunch of fucking morons and are about as Christian as the Westboro Baptist Church. Here’s hoping y’all get a nice long stay at the Gray Bar Motel.

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What's the Frequency Kenneth?

FULL DISCLOSURE: Every time you turn on your television, we here at PTB make one MILLION dollars.



For the last couple of days, RGJ/KTVN weather-dude Mike Alger has been lamenting the loss of the region’s NEXRAD radar site. Y'all know NEXRAD...it's the 21st century version of grandma's arthritic knee. Seems the little buggar was made out of toilet paper, scotch tape and bobby pins…NEXRAD…not Mike Alger or grandma. ANYWAY…


Alger tells us that the National Weather Service is getting together parts and pieces and probably won’t have NEXRAD fixed for “several weeks.” Here is the crux of today’s biscuit…


At the little T.V. station we work at, there’s an engineering department consisting of three guys whose only tools are a ball peen hammer, several rolls of duct tape and a couple of different lengths of bailing wire. When our signal goes off the air, the phone lights up like downtown Reno and people raise holy hell. “My T.V. went dark and I’m missing my stories,” shout the blue hairs. “My T.V. won’t work and I was right in the middle of watching American Idol,” say the young’uns. So our engineering boys hustle up the mountain to our transmitter and fix it with the instruments at their disposal…usually within a couple of minutes.


Question is…if the “Little Engineering Department That Could” can fix a multi-million dollar transmitter using a hair dryer, dental floss and Jello…why can’t the National Weather Service fix our NEXRAD in a timely fashion? Your guess is as good as ours but we figure that the only thing the Government-Cheese does quickly is bail out fat-cat Wall Street banker-types. The little guys? Yer on your own. Good thing we have plenty of duct tape!



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Boob Tube Banned by Boobs

As a rule, we don’t talk much about television ‘round here because…


FULL DISCLOSURE: Every time you watch television, we here at PTB make one MILLION dollars…


But last week, Saudi Arabia's top judiciary official issued a religious decree saying it is permissible to kill owners of satellite TV networks that broadcast “immoral” content because it causes the "deviance of thousands of people.” WOW…that’s some heavy guilt there. We knew television had influence on people but we had no idea it had that kinda pull.


The crux of today’s biscuit is twofold…


Saudi Arabia is George W. Bush’s closest ally and bestest friend. Now, Chimp-Dick has said time and time again that America will not tolerate oppressive regimes. That’s one of the (later) reasons he gave us for invading Iraq. So, how come WPE is willing to break our army by invading Mesopotamia and he licks the sweat off the nut sacks of Saudi Arabian leaders? It’s called being a hypocrite and anyone who doesn’t see that is either dumber than a bag of doorknobs or so far right that they make Karl Rove look like Teddy Kennedy.


Secondly…do you really think the Saudi royal family turns off the television when the Sopranos comes on? No. Fact of the matter is, those BSC motherhubbards watch Desperate Housewives, Weeds, Big Love , American Idol and all the other “immoral” shows out there in the comfort and privacy of their palaces while they down 40’s and smoke the “O”. Meanwhile, the unwashed masses don’t even have enough money to piss in a pot.


Control what people read, control what they see on television, control what they hear on the radio and they won’t realize what assholes y’all are. Saudi Arabia may be pResident Bush’s paramour but we know they’re just another bass-ackward third-world country, keepin’ down the little guy and living to excess. It’s what the Shah of Iran did the same thing and look what happened to him!


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The Wright Stuff

Today we’re gonna talk a little bit about Reverend Jeremiah Wright. We’ve been seeing, reading and hearing a lot of people trash him but we haven’t seen, read or heard anyone defend him. Well, we’re here to tell you…we’re gonna jump on the other side of that fence and throw a few fluff bombs of our own at Reverend Wright’s critics.







First things first – Jeremiah Wright is an American patriot. He served in the Navy AND the Marines. So, all the blowhards calling RJW a traitor can shove it up their asses. He has EARNED the right to say any damned thing he likes about the good ole’ USofA. And unless you were in both the Navy and the Marines…STFU!







When RJW gave his now infamous “God DAMN America” sermon it sure shook up whitey. But the quote was taken out of context. RJW wasn’t damning America or Americans…he was damning the United States Government. Big difference. Now, we’re not sure about his AIDS comments. After all…with what the government-cheese did to black soldiers at Tuskegee…we don’t put it past the rat-bastards to do that type of stuff today. The only question we have is why aren’t Black Americans more pissed off than they are?







Hell, last week a brown-skinded brother was found innocent of a crime through DNA testing. The dude spent TWENTY-SEVEN years in prison for a crime he didn’t commit. SHEESH! Hundreds of brothers have been released from prison under the exact same circumstances. The disproportionate number of black and brown and tan people in prison sure makes it look like the crackers are out to get ‘em.







Blacks had to wait almost a hundred years after the Civil War to play the American pastime! Hell, it took ‘till 1979 (and threats from the government) for blacks to be able to preach in the Mormon religion. WTF is up with that? On the outside looking in, we’ve gotta tell you…being a person of color in America today must really suck!







But the real point we wanna make today is about RJW’s 9/11 comment. You know…the one that said America’s foreign policy is what brought the terrorist attack? Hate to break it to all the redneck pink-asses out there but he’s right on the money. And if you don’t believe it, you’re as dumb as Chimp-Dick.







According to that BSC OBL, America’s presence in the Middle East (in particular the military presence in Saudi Arabia) was indeed the reason he plotted, then carried out, the 9/11 attacks. Muslims don’t hate America for our freedoms…they don’t hate us because of our decadent ways…they don’t even hate us for American Idol. No, the Muslims that DO hate us hate us ‘cause we’ve got soldiers in their holiest of holy places – Mecca. There’s nothing that pisses ‘em off more than our military marking territory where Muslims pray. And as long as we have a military presence in the Middle East, we’re all targets. Just because politicians say we have to fight ‘em over there so they don’t come here doesn’t make it true. As long as we’re over there…they’re on the way here. Reverend Wright hit the nose on the head…and we’re all too stupid to see it.








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