Mama Mia

Here at PTB we surely love the Catholics. Heck-fire, without them, the only Christian denominations we could make fun of would be the Baptists…and the Mormons. That being said, this week the Vatican contends that their priestly celibacy stance is not the root cause of the sex abuse scandal. WTF? Is the Pope on drugs? Hey Ratz…listen to me now and believe me later. I agree…requiring priests be celibate did not…I repeat…did not lead to the molestation of all those millions of kids. Priests not following the celibacy order is what caused it. I mean, if you can't keep your pecker in your smock, what's the use? Funny how the more “holy” people claim to be, the more sordid and fucked up they tend to be. True story.

Finally today…ABBA, among others, is being inducted into the Rock and Roll Hall of fame today. I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again…if you have a R&RHOF and Rush is not part of that hallowed group…y’all ain’t nuthin’ but poseurs. ABBA? Fucking ABBA? Shit…those cracker-assed-Swedish-crackers wouldn’t know rock and roll if it bit ‘em on their polyester bell bottoms. No Rush = No Respect.

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Hall of Lame

This year...just like every year since they became eligible...Rush has been passed over for induction into the Rock & Roll Hall of Fame. WTF are the judges thinking? The nominees this year, in alphabetical order were: Jeff Beck, Chic, Wanda Jackson, Little Anthony & the Imperials, Metallica, Run D.M.C, the Stooges, War and Bobby Womack. We can understand Little Anthony and the Mighty Met. War? Well...we're a little biased. We did a rendition of Why Can't We Be Friends with 'em at Harrah's back in the day. But Run D.M.C.? SHEESH! They're not rockers, they're RAPPERS! Chic? Puh-Leeze...they're a fuckin' DISCO band! AYE CARAMBA! Here at PTB we look at it this way: Until Rush is inducted, it's nothing more than the Hall of Lame.


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The Sound of Music

If there has ever been a bigger traveshamockery in the history of music, we've never heard of it. Last week the Rock & Roll Hall of Fame announced its newest inductees. On the list: Madonna, John Mellencamp, the Ventures and the Dave Clark Five. WTF is THAT all about?

Madonna is a pop singer...no different than Bobby Sherman or Keith Partridge or the Banana Splits.

Every song "JCougarM" ever did sounds EXACTLY like every other song he's ever done.

The Ventures? One hit...the theme from Hawaii Five-O. Hell, they didn't even have a vocalist!!! The Dave Clark Five? They've got a couple of good songs...but there's no way they're Hall-worthy.

Which brings us to the crux of this biscuit...why is the Hall dissing Rush? Rush has been awarded several Juno Awards and was inducted into the Canadian Music Hall of Fame in 1994. Over the course of their thirty plus year career, the individual members of Rush have been recognized as some of the most proficient players on their respective instruments with each member winning several awards in magazine readers' polls. As a whole, Rush boasts 24 gold records and 14 platinum (3 multi-platinum) records. These statistics place Rush fifth behind The Beatles, The Rolling Stones, Kiss and Aerosmith for the most consecutive gold and platinum albums by a rock band. If those stats don't get you in...who do you have to blow?!?

So, to R&RHoF President Joel Peresman...if you ain't got Rush in your Hall...it's just an empty building.