Why JZeus Spins in His Grave

A couple of quick thoughts on PoBen bein’ on this side of the ATL…

If the Pope is the voice of God on earth…how come he needs such tight security? Wouldn’t the invisible man in the sky take care of that stuff? Pope’s got so much muscle, he looks like skeevy Uncle Fester visiting a market in Baghdad.

The Pope mentioned that Americans need to make their political choices with compassion. Does that mean he’s against the war? If the Pope is against the war but pResident chimp-dick isn’t Catholic, can we still bomb the shit out of Iran?

Wouldn’t the two BILLION dollars y’all had to pay to clergy sex-abuse victims been better off helping the poor rather than buying off accusers? BTW…how the hell does a church get BILLIONS of dollars? Something about throwing out the money changers comes to mind here.

With all your secret church rituals (think The DaVinci Code), your way out there ideas (no birth control, a couple of times around a rosary and you’re clean as a whistle) and your clergy’s penchant for pedophilia…what makes the Catholic Church different than the FLDS?

If Catholics have to go to marriage counseling before they get hitched in the church, why are they counseled by a priest who’s never been, and never gonna be, married? WTF does a priest know about marriage?

One last thing straight to you PoBen. You said today that the clergy sex-abuse scandal needs to be viewed in the “wider context of secularism and the over-sexualization of America.” Do you really believe that horseshit? Look bro, 26 million Americans might think you’re the mouthpiece of God but here at PTB we know better. The only difference between you and the motherhubbards that excommunicated Galileo is a couple hundred years. Quit blaming your problems on people who don’t believe in your magic fairies and quit blaming your problems on American’s sexual appetites. You know little to nothing about either.

@:

:@

Random Acts of Mindless

There’s so much goin’ on ‘round the place we wanted to talk about as many of ‘em as time would allow. So today, we’re all over. Think of it as “drive-by posting.”



There was so much security around the Olympic torch yesterday, it looked like John McCain visiting a Baghdad market.



The city of Reno has to pay $100,000 to a couple of dancers and their boss ‘cause they got roughed up by the RePoPo. Their crime? Stripping without a license. SHEESH! Yo Reno-911…go find Brianna’s killer and leave the strippers alone.



You can’t go on strike and picket your work unless you give ‘em an exact time? That’s one of the stupidest friggin’ rules on the book.



A couple of cops in the NYC get busted for buying illegal steroids from the bad guys. Now NYPD Blue is gonna randomly test all 36,000 officers. Another example of why “Rudy in the Booty” are BSC!



No one wanted the biomass plant down in the Capital ‘ceptin’ the government-cheese. Turns out the people were right. The bugger’s gonna cost us more than it earns for the next 17 years. And now, we’re spendin’ more than a half a million dollars to hire peeps to work the thing ‘cause the state doesn’t have anyone qualified to run it. Who was gonna run it originally? Inmates. Wonder why we hate politicians?



Finally, Sgt. Timothy Smith. Another life wasted on the lies of pResident GWB. This fuckin’ war is NEVER gonna end. Saddest part is that most of the 775 voted for chimp-dick. TWICE! They tell you they support our troops and you believe ‘em. Then the troops get tagged and bagged and you STILL believe ‘em. Must be easy bein’ a sheep.




(8.-)

Fox Trot

Last week Nevada hoops fans dodged a bullet when Cal hired Mike Montgomery as their new head coach.

But the bullets are still flying. Former Pack head coach Trent Johnson is leaving Stanford and is headed off to coach the Bayou Bengals. You know what that means?

Mark Fox is outta here faster than a Metamucil milkshake goes through John McCain.



Guess that's two asses getting hit with the exit doors out the 775.

We'll lay 2-1 odds that coach Fox is headed west by the end of the month. Hell...we'll lay 3-1 he's outta here by the end of the week.

No worries though, Pack fans. Next in the big chair...another ass-kicking coach.


Go Pack!




@:
:@

Happy Anniversary Baby

“No one knew what to expect when the Iraq war began March 19, 2003.” That, from the front page of today’s RGJ. We don’t mean to harsh the Gaz’s mellow but PTB saw this clusterfuck coming a mile away and we’re dumber than a bag of Skittles! We shouted from the rooftops, we argued and we sounded the alarms. What did we get in response? We were called Frog-lovers. We were called pacifists. We were called traitors. Funny, we haven’t heard from those folks lately. Guess it’s pretty hard to talk with a mouth full of crow. But we weren’t the only ones who knew.



Bush-Wipe knew. Rummy knew. Colin-Blow knew. Dick knew. Brown Rice knew. Halliburton knew. KBR knew. War-profiteers and hatemongers all.



So, it’s five years down the line. What’s changed? Did we find WMD’s? No. Did we give the Iraqi people democracy? No. Have we quelled the insurgency? No. Are Iraqis better off now than they were five years ago? No. Is the M.E. more stable now? No. Is America safer now? No. The list is as endless as this war.



What’s changed? Four thousand brave American soldiers – DEAD. More than a half million Iraqi civilians – DEAD. Gas is three dollars a gallon. Oil is $110 a barrel. OBL is still on the loose and neither the pResident or any of his wannabe successors mention his name anymore. Hell, crazy Uncle McFester wants us to stay in the Bag for a hundred more years. SHEESH!



No folks, this war is wrong. It’s just as wrong now as it was five years ago. When our kids look back at this dark chapter in American history they’ll see the beginning of the end. We were the greatest nation in the world once. That was before the Iraq war. How far the mighty have fallen. You might not have seen it coming but we did.




@:
:@

Obama-gasm

Last night Barack Obama swept the Chesapeake primaries like a washerwoman on a dirty kitchen floor. It was a spankin' of epic proportions. Watching the 'Bamer give his victory speech gave us chills. In front of 18,000 screamin' Badgers BoB showed us all his ideas of positive possibilities.


After seven years of chimp-dick lippin' things like "Stay the course", "You're either with us or against us" and "Nukyuler" it was refreshing to hear someone tell it like it is rather than someone spewin’ what they think we want to hear.


On the other side JMac was plain creepy. Addressing a crowd numbering less than GWB's I.Q., in a room smaller than a bathroom stall in the Minneapolis airport, surrounded by fossilized crackers, he stumbled along like he was a naked eighth grader giving a presentation to the entire school. At one point, Mr. “1,000 Years War” said, “There is no greater threat, no bigger obstacle than the patriotism of the American public. The lady standing behind him heard that and looked as if she’d swallowed a bug. Priceless. Yo JMac…get a new speechwriter and actually look over the stuff before you open yer spew-hole.


After hearin’ the ‘Bamer orate the chrome off a trailer hitch and McCain using the same talking points as every other Bush-Wipe…PTB scratched in our little notebook: Game. Over.


(8.-)