Mama Mia

Here at PTB we surely love the Catholics. Heck-fire, without them, the only Christian denominations we could make fun of would be the Baptists…and the Mormons. That being said, this week the Vatican contends that their priestly celibacy stance is not the root cause of the sex abuse scandal. WTF? Is the Pope on drugs? Hey Ratz…listen to me now and believe me later. I agree…requiring priests be celibate did not…I repeat…did not lead to the molestation of all those millions of kids. Priests not following the celibacy order is what caused it. I mean, if you can't keep your pecker in your smock, what's the use? Funny how the more “holy” people claim to be, the more sordid and fucked up they tend to be. True story.

Finally today…ABBA, among others, is being inducted into the Rock and Roll Hall of fame today. I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again…if you have a R&RHOF and Rush is not part of that hallowed group…y’all ain’t nuthin’ but poseurs. ABBA? Fucking ABBA? Shit…those cracker-assed-Swedish-crackers wouldn’t know rock and roll if it bit ‘em on their polyester bell bottoms. No Rush = No Respect.

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Sounding Bored

While I am truly enjoying the width and breadth of the 2010 Winter Olympics, I am having a very hard time stomaching skeevy Bob Costas. The dude tries way too hard to be cool and funny. Just like me, ‘Ceptin’ he’s rich and famous and I live in a basement. But aside from that…

So I reached back into my bag of tricks and I came up with an awesome solution. Do any of y’all remember the Pink Floyd/Wizard of Oz game? That’s where you start the album Dark Side of the MoonWizard of Oz disappears. exactly as the last of the opening credits of the It is almost otherworldly how the lyrics and the music link up with the visuals. Y’all oughtta try it sometime. So I started experimenting with NBC’s Olympic coverage and several different bands. Five Finger Death Punch to go along with halfpipe. Lynyrd Skynyrd to go with downhill skiing. Rush to go with Luge. You get the point. I’ve had a lot of happy accidents over the last few days (no, not the “I pottied in the big boy’s potty.” happy accidents). Sometimes the music and the video is so spot on, you’d think they were made for each other.

I’m tellin’ ya…y’all should try it. Pick your event, pick your band and enjoy. After all, whadda you have to lose but precious time with skeevy Bob Costas?

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Fly By White

Except for the two hours of Nevada’s basketball game last night, I’m lovin’ me some Winter Olympics. Yup, that Shaun White surely tore up the half pipe. That dude can flat-out fly! So in honor of monsieur White’s accomplishments and knowing he hates the nickname “Flying Tomato,” PTB is gonna drop a couple of new ones – “White Out” or “The Red Baron.” All yours bro! Congrats.

As you may have noticed, the 775 has quite a few athletes in these games. Yesterday, one of our girls, Julia Mancuso, got a silver in the women’s downhill. WAY TO GO JULES! So I’m watchin’ her run last night with a barley pop and out of the announcer’s pie hole came, “It’s a tough course out there but Mancuso likes it rough and bumpy.” Insert one beer-filled spit-take and high comedy reigned supreme.

Has anyone else noticed the Olympic promo starring Rascal Flats? The country (AND western) trio are belting out one of their tunes to video of Johnny Weir bein’ flamboyantly gay and a bunch of hockey dudes hugging each other. The dichotomy of the music and the video is a classic example of unintentional comedy in its highest form.

And lastly…all over this Olympic coverage I hear announcers talk about the many cool and awesome things that belong to Canada. Mounties… Molson…and Wayne Gretzky to name three. But in all the coverage I’ve watched, not once has an announcer mentioned Geddy Lee, Alex Lifeson or Neil Peart, collectively known as Rush. Longtime readers of PTB know we’re big Rush fans and it’s disappointing not to hear any mention of one of the greatest rock bands ever …who also happen to be from CANADA! I wonder if skeevy Bob Costas or any of the other myriad announcers and production crew even know what they’re missing? They might not…but I do.

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Hall of Lame

This year...just like every year since they became eligible...Rush has been passed over for induction into the Rock & Roll Hall of Fame. WTF are the judges thinking? The nominees this year, in alphabetical order were: Jeff Beck, Chic, Wanda Jackson, Little Anthony & the Imperials, Metallica, Run D.M.C, the Stooges, War and Bobby Womack. We can understand Little Anthony and the Mighty Met. War? Well...we're a little biased. We did a rendition of Why Can't We Be Friends with 'em at Harrah's back in the day. But Run D.M.C.? SHEESH! They're not rockers, they're RAPPERS! Chic? Puh-Leeze...they're a fuckin' DISCO band! AYE CARAMBA! Here at PTB we look at it this way: Until Rush is inducted, it's nothing more than the Hall of Lame.


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Smokin' Aces

Funny, we thought it was ILLEGAL to smoke marijuana in the 775. If you hadn’t noticed, we rolled over to the Rush concert in downtown Reno Saturday night. Longtime readers know that we think Rush is the best thing to come out of the Great White North since Dudley-Do-Right’s woman. ANYWAY…


When the lights dimmed and the show started, a plume of smoke started risin’ above the crowd. It looked like someone dropped a nuke. WHOOSH! There was so much smoke between the stage and our seats it actually distorted the light coming from the strobe lights…or maybe that was a secondhand buzz? Hell, it looked like the fog rollin’ in off the SFBay. But here’s the crux of our biscuit…


Why were the cops not bustin’ those hemp-lovin’, tie-died, hippy freaks? Were they givin’ the pot-heads their tacit approval? Was Reno-911 waiting for ‘em to get out on the streets and pop a cap in someone? Kill a cop? Or just go generally BSC like EVERYONE does when exposed to the killer evil weed?


Look folks…this “wink, wink, nod, nod” shit needs to stop. There are thousands of people incarcerated here in the 775 for possession of the ganja. There are so many tokers in the hoosegow that the prison system is at the breaking point. So, are y’all gonna stay rutted in your hypocritical ways and selectively imprison stoners? Or are you gonna wake up and realize that marijuana is no more dangerous than aspirin and a LOT less dangerous than alcohol or tobacco?


We figure that if all those people were smokin’ blunts and there weren’t any big problems…what’s the big problem? On the other hand, if the schnizzle is illegal...it should be illegal everywhere. It would have made for a lonely concert…but at least, we could have seen the stage.

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Rollin' The Bones

Well...that was one hella good Saturday PM.

We were kinda hopin' to see Dawn but we didn't...wish she were here.

Alas...that's a different concert.

The vid above is a ditty from the show.

As far as we're concerned...the RRHoF can go to hell!!! Rush Rocks!!!

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The Sound of Music

If there has ever been a bigger traveshamockery in the history of music, we've never heard of it. Last week the Rock & Roll Hall of Fame announced its newest inductees. On the list: Madonna, John Mellencamp, the Ventures and the Dave Clark Five. WTF is THAT all about?

Madonna is a pop singer...no different than Bobby Sherman or Keith Partridge or the Banana Splits.

Every song "JCougarM" ever did sounds EXACTLY like every other song he's ever done.

The Ventures? One hit...the theme from Hawaii Five-O. Hell, they didn't even have a vocalist!!! The Dave Clark Five? They've got a couple of good songs...but there's no way they're Hall-worthy.

Which brings us to the crux of this biscuit...why is the Hall dissing Rush? Rush has been awarded several Juno Awards and was inducted into the Canadian Music Hall of Fame in 1994. Over the course of their thirty plus year career, the individual members of Rush have been recognized as some of the most proficient players on their respective instruments with each member winning several awards in magazine readers' polls. As a whole, Rush boasts 24 gold records and 14 platinum (3 multi-platinum) records. These statistics place Rush fifth behind The Beatles, The Rolling Stones, Kiss and Aerosmith for the most consecutive gold and platinum albums by a rock band. If those stats don't get you in...who do you have to blow?!?

So, to R&RHoF President Joel Peresman...if you ain't got Rush in your Hall...it's just an empty building.