Friday, February 1, 2008

The REAL Reasons God Hates Reno



Regular readers of PTB know that we don't put much faith in the "Invisible Man in the Sky." We do believe however, that people can worship anything they want. That's what the USofA is all about. Then here comes the Westboro Baptist Church of Topeka, Kansas. It seems that the most God-less church in all of Christdom is of the opinion that God hates Reno. AWESOME! Better to be hated than to be ignored. According to the group’s Web site, God also hates Sweden, Canada, Ireland and Mexico. So much for the Bikini Team, hockey, Lucky Charms and Jose Feliciano. As it is...we thought we'd try to figure out exactly why the big Kahuna is hatin' on the 775. Here's what we figured:



Top Ten Reasons God Hates Reno


10. He’s shorter than John Ascuaga.

9. We don’t care how you spend your money.

8. Our burning bushes are made out of neon.

7. We worship in our own way on Sundays.

6. We covet our neighbor’s wife, his asses and everything else he has. That’s the way the economy works.

5. We think Nevada is God’s country and Nevadan’s are Gods chosen people. That’s why we’re all so good looking.

4. We think the best things God made were the female body, the male body and Lake Tahoe. Not necessarily in that order.

3. We think of beer as “God’s favorite drink.”

2. We don’t care where you stick your woody.

1. We call spending 40 nights in the desert “Burning Man.”
(8.-)