Friday, May 30, 2008

Free Association Friday

Is politician the only job where if you get divorced, bang a ‘ho or have an EMA you have to resign? Hell…even priests get to keep their jobs! We do wonder though, how you can keep your Government-Cheese gig after gettin’ busted for trolling for gay sex in an airport bathroom.

Everyone’s gettin’ their Underoos in a twist over Scotty Mac’s new book. There’s nothin’ in there we didn’t already know. But notice how critics of the book are raggin’ on Scottie Mac the person while ignoring revelations that Chimp-Dick, Dr. Evil and Scooter are guilty of treason? We’ve gotta say…if this pResident was a Democrat, they’d have opened up a can of impeaches on his ass long ago.

WTF? A tent city in the Biggest Little City? If we’re the greatest country in the world, how the fuck come we’ve got homeless people livin’ in tents? We wonder…would JZeus rather spend a billion dollars a month bombin’ brown-skinded brothers or helping the homeless?

Four arrests in one weekend. Looks like the Wolf Pack football team is in mid-season form already.

We don’t quite get WTF is up with all this Sex and the City hype. We’ve read everything we could about the hoopla surrounding the new flick. The motherhubbard should be re-titled Clothes and the City” ‘cause we couldn’t find sex anywhere. What a ripoff.

Speakin’ ‘bout SatC…if you spend $400 on a pair of shoes or $500 for a purse or $1,000 for a dress…you’ve got some really messed up priorities.

The First Lady is accusing the Governor of having a girlfriend and he’s denying it. Now, we know what you’re thinkin’, “Is there really a heterosexual republican politician out there?” Yo Gov., just cop to the fact that you’re puttin’ tab “A” into slot “B” and let’s move on. We wanna get to the juicy stuff.

We didn’t know this, but here in the 775 you can get a citation for “failing to carry out your duties as a parent.” WTF is up with that? Is there a list of parental duties somewhere? Are we gonna cite parents of obese kids for letting poor Suzie and Bobby eat at Mickey-D's? Are we gonna cite parents who let their kids listen to gangsta rap? Can you say “overkill”?

And lastly today…wildfires in the 775 are getting bigger and more dangerous. No. Duh. Wanna know why? ‘cause more and more people are building their houses in the middle of the forest. When a fire hits, we all drop trow and stamp the motherhubbard out. That leaves more schizzle to burn the next time ‘round. Forest fires are nature’s way of thinning things out. When we interfere, things get worse. Question: Who put out Tahoe forest fires back in the days of Ben, Hoss and little Joe? Answer: No one. And it all worked out fine for them.