Wednesday, April 15, 2009

Gilbert, Gibbons and the Green Door

Local boxer turned lawyer Joey Gilbert says he wants to be a State Senator. Some people are concerned about his lack of experience and that he’d only get elected through name recognition. We say, “Go for it.” Gilbert would be a great Republican State Senator. Why? He’s a lying cheater who was suspended from boxing for having more drugs in his system than Cheech and Chong. Oh yeah…AND he has a very wide stance. Yup…Joey Gilbert…Republican to the core.

Governor Jim Gibbons should just STFU when it comes to marriage. Yesterday GJG said he wouldn’t sign a bill allowing employers to give domestic partners the same benefits that traditional couples get. Yo Guv…taking marriage advice from you is like taking marriage advice from a Catholic priest. Neither of y’all know the first friggin’ thing about marriage. BTW…yo Dawn Gibbons…we’re still waiting for your call. Remember…rebound sex is the best!

Speaking of sex…Marilyn Chambers sleeps with the fishes. For decades the Ivory Snow and Behind the Green Door star kept many a young boy contented and warm. Compared to the plastic-tittied, Botox-injected, tramp-stamped porn skanks today, she was a goddess! We would say we’re gonna miss her but we have every movie she’s ever made so she’ll be with us a long time. Here’s wankin’ to you Marilyn!