Boy oh Boy

Wow, the US Army sure has it bad lately. Not just ‘cause Chimp Dick sent ‘em and Barry-O is keepin’ ‘em in the “unwinnable suck,” but because they’re having a hard time recruiting soldiers. You see, a few years back, to stock up bodies for Afghanistan and Iraq, the Army had to loosen its standards for lettin’ people in. They let in felons, and dope fiends…hell, they let everyone in but the gays. Anyway, now the “Be All That You Can Be” crowd is losing recruits ‘cause American teens are too fat. Aye caramba! You mean you can’t slim down the doughboys and girls with a little boot camp ass-whoopin? Guess not.

Some say the problem lies with parents who find it easier to babysit little Billy with a Twinkie and television rather than real parenting. Some are calling on manufacturers to cut the amount of salt in processed foods. Hmmm…you don’t hear the Teabaggers moanin’ about THAT government overreach, do you? But I’m not pointing the finger in that direction. No, I put the blame for America’s flabby kids square on the shoulders of…the Boy Scouts.

That’s right, the Boy Scouts of America are responsible for the fattening of our youth. How do I know? Last week the BSA announced they were awarding a new merit badge for…get this…video games. Aye caramba! Once the bastion of everything outdoors – from whittling and fire making to killing a bear with dental floss, the Boy Scouts now award kids for sitting on their asses. What’s next, a merit badge for television trivia?

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Just Being Social (ist)

Here in the USo’A, we’ve socialized our military. After all, fighting the Brits, or the Krauts, or the Commies, or whoever is in the Enemy of the Month Club is a function so important; we need the juice of the Government to get the job done right.

Do you think Blackwater could do a better job than the US Army? I don’t.

We’ve socialized law enforcement. Catching perps and tossin’ ‘em in the Gray Bar Motel is such an important function that we’ve given the Government-Cheese the task of keeping us safe from the baddies. You know who I’m talkin’ ‘bout: Shopkeepers who sell alcohol to minors, ‘ho’s, stoners, college kids illegally downloading music…you know really bad guys.

Do you think Paul Blart or 21 Jump Street can do a better job than The real PoPo? I don’t.

I t just seems to me that if our safety, our security and our protection is so important to us that we have to trust the government to do it, why isn’t the health of our children that important too? How ‘bout the health and welfare of millions of senior citizens and people living in poverty? How ‘bout our own health? Change the system? The smart ones say HELL YES! The government can't be as bad as private companies. The airheads who spout right-wing talking points say HELL NO! After all, the government wouldn’t do nearly as good a job as big pharma, the health insurance industry or corporate, for-profit hospital chains.

Hell, and I always thought we had a government of the people for the people and by the people. Maybe we could just let big business run the government too? Oh yeah, I forgot…they already do. SHEESH!

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Childrens They Do Learn

Here at PTB we LOVE our brothers and sisters in uniform.


Alas, Bush-Wipe and his ilk (just like Der BSC and his Nazi buddies) have us in a helluva pickle.


People hate it when we compare all the pResident's men to the little dictator but check it:

They had stormtroopers...we have stormtroopers.


They had gulags...we have gulags.



They had two fronts...we have two fronts. Sound familiar?


Here's the problem. We need more troops than we have and the Government-Cheese's solution is to drop standards for recruits! Now they're letting in drug addicts and rapists and murderers and just plain dumbasses. It seems the only people the (h)Army doesn't want are the gays. You know, 'cause those gays are freakin' CRAZY!


(8.-)

Who Would Jesus Nuke?

With all the crap we hear about terrorists using “dirty bombs” it was an ass-chapper to read that, back in the day, the good ole USofA was considering the same type of nefarious methodology.


You’d think that type of bullshit thinking would be long over. You’d have thought wrong. Ever heard of depleted uranium? It is some nasty shit and our very own U.S. Army is using it every day in Afghanistan and Iraq. Nice, huh?


We find it vomit-inducing when politicians claim the U.S. is a country founded on Christian values yet they heed little of what the SOG said.


The cradle of civilization will be radioactive for thousands of years and it's all our fault.


(8.-)

We Don't Need No Edu-ma-cation

ALLRIGHT, school is out here in the 775!

A couple of things to remember kiddies...

Don't let your friends and family get too happy at graduation...

Sell your soul now so you can afford college...

and

If you need a job...here ya go.

Welcome to the real world.

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