Thursday, July 31, 2008

Beers of Fury

It has been a staple on college campuses from the dawn of time. It is a sport that can be played equally well by men and women. The competition is quick, intense, sometimes bordering on insanity. And now buzzkills around the country want it all to stop. WTF are we talking about? Beer Pong.

Georgetown, The University of Pennsylvania, Yale, U-Mass and Tufts are only a few of the schools forbidding the evil game. Heck, entire towns in New Jersey have illegal-ized the sport. In Utah, they probably throw you in prison if they catch you BP’ing. Their reasoning is simple: Kids who play Beer Pong tend to drink beer. Maybe a bit too much beer. No kidding.

Now, we’ve got no problem with the Government-Cheese trying to keep kids safe. Although, we do think that if you’re old enough to die for your country in some far-away war zone, you SHOULD be able to slam a few barley pops. But that’s the crux of a different biscuit.

But what is the reasoning behind prohibiting people of legal age from playing Beer Pong? Belmar, New Jersey’s city council passed an ordinance declaring that outdoor BP “exposed unconsenting neighbors to foul language, rowdy and disorderly behavior and examples of the consumption of alcohol under circumstances that are detrimental.”

Look guys. Drinking alcohol is detrimental no matter what. Banning a game ‘cause people drink while doing it is stupid. You wanna know what kids will do when you take away their Beer Pong? They’ll invent a new game…like sitting in front of the television with a case of Keystone and every time a commercial for Viagra or Cialis comes on, they’ll slam a beer. They call it “Beer Dong.”

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