Tuesday, July 8, 2008

Happiness is a Warm Gun

Goofy with an Uzi? Looks like the Happiest Place on Earth just got a bit happier.

Here at PTB we love our guns. We pack heat. We think EVERYONE should 10-32. That’s why we’re not too worried that tighty-righties in the Sunshine State want employees of Disney World to be able to CARRY GUNS.

Two reasons:

First, anyone who’s ever worked with kids knows that the little buggers could use a good wingin’ now and then. Brings new meaning to the term “time out”. We’re not talking ‘bout poppin’ a cap in little Billy, but if the little raggamuffin kicks Donald Duck in the shin again…POW!

And secondly, just think, no one will ever want to commit a crime at DW ever again. Why? ‘Cause if you were the guy that got shot by Minnie Mouse…you wouldn’t last a minute in the slam. You’d be the laughingstock of your cell block. Now that’s what we call a deterrent.

We kid though…Dis-ployees WOULDN'T be able to carry weapons into the park. They’d have to leave ‘em in their cars. Opponents point out that lots of people get capped by someone who got angry, went back to their car and got a gun. Florida State Representative Stan Mayfield defends the new law by saying that your car is an extension of your home…KEWL!

As soon as we get to DW’s parking lot, we’re gonna do the nasty in the back seat, take a wiz out of the side window, then hang our laundry to dry on the open hood. After all, that’s what we do in OUR house.

Actually, our house is really Mom & Dad’s house…we just live in the basement…but we’ll get their permission.


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