Monday, September 22, 2008

Lemme Hold A Dollar

Much like the little raggimuffin Oliver holding out his empty gruel bowl and asking the head of the orphanage, “Please sir, may I have some more?” Chimp-Dick stood in front of the American people last week and asked for $700 BILLION to bail out the bourgie fat-cat bankers of Wall Street.

There are two prongs to the fundamentalist extremists in the Reflublican party. The warmongering hawks like Dr. Evil, Rummy and Karl Rove and the economic, free-market turds like Phil Gramm and John McCain. Both groups have only their selfish interests at heart. Don’t believe us? We’ll go with the neo-econo-cons for now…

Back in the day Ronald “Celebrity, Actor, Elitist” Reagan helped his tighty-righty friends deregulate the Savings and Loan industry. What happened? The greedy rat-bastards stole all their investors’ money and the Government-Cheese bailed ‘em out with…wait for it…wait for it…taxpayer money!

Since then they’ve deregulated, then had to bail out:

Energy Corporations

The Housing Market


Insurance Companies

And now, possibly, the Auto industry.

Ay Caramba! They deregulate an industry so their corporate cronies can steal all the money they can, then they put us…you and me…on the hook for the bill. It’s called corporate welfare and the Reflublicans are fond of it. Think about it…

If you opened up an ice cream store and only served flavors like Mushroom Cap and Potato-skin Swirl or Liver and Onion Sorbet…all the while skimming profits and cooking the books…you’d go out of business pretty quick. If that happened, do you think the Government-Cheese would bail you out? Hell. No.

Do you know who famously said, “The fundamentals of our economy are strong.”? If you’d have said John McCain…you’d only be 2008 right. The first person we can confirm said it was…wait for it…wait for it…HERBERT FRIGGIN’ HOOVER! He said it in 1931. Nice. What’s that they say about those who forget history? Nah, forget it…


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