Tuesday, September 23, 2008

Dawn Patrol

We make no secret of it…here at PTB we love us some Dawn Gibbons. If we had our way, we’d slather her up with some tangy barbeque sauce and work her like a pork rib…but that’s the crux of another biscuit.

We just read that the soon-to-be former First Lady of Nevada is suing GJG for more muscle after he cut the number of NHP troopers watching over her. The Gov’s office reported earlier this month that Delta Dawn won’t be given security for non-official functions like going to the gym or stoppin’ by her momma's house. As usual, PTB to the rescue.

Madam First Lady, may we offer ourselves up to be at your service. Mind you, we don’t go to swanky parties or cotillions or soirées so your social calendar might get a little light. But hangin’ with us really isn’t so bad.

Mom & Dad’s basement is nice and cool in the summer and not too cold in the winter. We play beer pong and video games into the wee hours of the night. Heck, we even take the occasional shower but if you moved in, we’d take a LOT more (that way your momma won’t hate us).

So, whadda ya say First Lady? You’re a free woman…we’ll make you an honest one. Bring plenty of napkins, toothpicks and dental floss. As Theron famously said in the movie 300, “If we were lesser men, she’d be set on us still.” YOW!


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