Friday, June 25, 2010

I Think We're Gonna Need A Bigger Boat

Y’all might remember this story: A while back, one bad-assed Carcharodon carcharias was munchin’ on Amity Islanders like they were Krispy Kremes. The PoPo was freakin’ out…the short dude from The Goodbye Girl was freakin’ out…everyone on the island was freakin’ out ‘ceptin’ the one dude who should have been…the Mayor. You know, the guy in charge.

That story reminds me of what’s happening in the Gulf of Mexico. We’ve got this life-devouring monster killing wildlife and wetlands and, in the future, people – and politicians are acting like Mayor Larry Vaughn. Caribou Barbie? “Drill Baby Drill.” Governor Alfred E. Neumann? “A drilling moratorium will kill jobs.” Senator sucking at the monetary teat of big oil? “I’m sorry that you have to pay.”

What we need right now is a real-life Sam Quint. Someone to screech his fingernails down the chalkboard of our collective brain pans. Someone with the huevos rancheros to take down this beast. Someone who is in this thing to help the American people…unlike government-cheese dicks looking out for the one thing they really care about…their careers. Any takers?


1 comment:

David Allen said...

Rant all you want at BP and the Oil industry... but I'm guessing your car runs on gasoline just like everyone else's... and until your car can run on rainbows or unicorn farts we're just going to have to keep drilling for that oil even with the occasional risk of spillage. It would be great if electric cars were a viable alternative - but last I checked we barely have enough to light our homes thanks to the evironmentalists shutting down Yucca Mt. and every nuclear plant they can get their hands on..